An Absolutely Remarkable Thing by Hank Green

Author:Hank Green
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi, azw3, pdf
Publisher: Penguin Publishing Group
Published: 2018-09-26T00:00:00+00:00

March 17

@PrimePatr1ot: Sometimes I wonder how much people like April May are being paid to shill for the government.

@AprilMaybeNot: They pay me in PopTarts. So. Many. PopTarts. Why did I sign this deal? I have a problematic number of PopTarts.

I’m leaning out over my balcony, watching, with Andy standing next to me. He’s filming as they remove the tent from over Carl and reopen 23rd Street. Thank the lord, the noise will be back. Also, now I can truly look down on Carl and see him there beside the phone booths that, for some reason, are still taking up valuable street real estate in Manhattan.

My book is in the hands of a legion of copy editors trying to find every mistake and mislaid argument. There’s nothing I can do to help it at the moment, which is wonderful because I’m fucking sick of the book. Also, we’ve got videos to make.

The army of experts who had been flowing into the tent they had erected around Carl had figured out more or less absolutely nothing in the past few weeks. Did they deliver uranium to Carl to see what happened? I don’t know, but I’m pretty sure someone somewhere did, though it didn’t seem that there was any immediate effect. If they did discover something new about Carl, they didn’t tell anyone.

What we knew was that he wasn’t standing on the sidewalk; he was hovering very slightly above it, latched onto space somehow. He was not at all thermally conductive; it seemed that the atoms of our world didn’t even interact with the atoms of his body. He couldn’t be moved or damaged. It was as if we could see him, but he was not actually in our space. Except for Hollywood Carl’s hand, of course, which still hadn’t been seen since it disappeared into that weird magicians’ club.

Suddenly, Peter Petrawicki was there, down on the street, followed closely by a young guy holding a camera. Some police started harassing him—I couldn’t hear what was happening. He looked indignant; he was gesturing to Carl, and to the building behind him. The police looked like they really, really didn’t want to be in the video, but they also had instructions to not let anyone near Carl right now. Besides, the street hadn’t been opened yet, so how did he even get in?

“How can anyone look at that guy and not immediately get that he is the worst thing that ever existed?” Andy said.

“There are people who say the same thing about me,” I mused.

Peter posted the video later, and of course Andy and I watched it. It’s mostly Peter saying, “What have you found out? Is it safe? You clearly thought there was enough danger to block off the street last month, what have you found out that makes it safe now? The people deserve to know!” That kind of thing. But then he cuts from the street to him sitting in a small but chic office.

“Eventually, a time comes when we must take some action.

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